When my son, Brett was thirteen he wanted me to buy him a snake. I absolutely refused. Of all “pets”, reptilian ones were (are) not welcome in my home…ever! I have a fearful aversion to snakes having had a traumatic experience as a child with a garter snake that a neighbour boy caught and put down the back of my one piece swimsuit. I still squirm thinking about it! I don’t much care for arachnids or insects either, still, my son persisted on asking, and I held firm to my resolve by saying he could get a snake when he was an adult.

Just before Christmas, we were invited over to my son’s for dinner. His three boys seemed eager for me to meet the newest addition to the family. When I saw the large glass enclosure in the corner of the room I recoiled with horror.

“A snake?” I backed away slowly but ready to bolt for the door.

“Nope, a Dragon!” My seven year old grandson exclaimed.

A little bearded dragon to be precise named, “Kevin”.

As far as lizards go, I’m not as adverse to “Beardies” as I call them, than others. As long as we keep our distance from one another that is. However, after supper, my son decided to let the little dragon out of his cage and plunked him unceremoniously on my shoulder. Let it be said that this Grandma showed her “cool factor” by not panicking, and remaining composed as Kevin perched on me. I could feel his beady eyes glaring at me. His tongue and talons ready to strike with swift attack if I showed any sign of fear. My three grandsons were disappointed at my calm demeaner. Obviously, my son had primed them beforehand to see if he could make their grandma scream. I was not going to give them the satisfaction. Although, a scream was squelched at the back of my throat when Kevin decided to jump and became a bit entangled in my hair.

I have Christmas stockings hanging on my mantle for all my children, their spouses, my grandchildren and even one for all my grand pets. This year, Kevin was added to the mantle stocking collection. My son was impressed I’m sure.

My son is an avid hunter, and he hunts with several friends from his church. He fills his freezer with game every season. In 2023, he actually made the record books here in Alberta for the biggest buck brought down that year. I never pegged him for a hunter as he is one of the most tender-hearted people I know. As a teen he actually cried when Godzilla died in a movie we watched. He had no trouble shooting gophers on our acreage, but I thought he might be too sensitive to hunt larger game.

After his successful hunt last year, Brett noticed that people like to decorate their homes with the antlers and skulls that have been bleached and mounted for display purposes. Some talented artists paint cow, moose and deer skulls, and some of these pieces of art sell for thousands of dollars. That said, there are not a lot of suitably processed animal skulls for that purpose around here so there is a market for this. My son researched how to prepare a skull and it requires a large colony of Dermestid flesh-eating beetles that pick the bone clean and then the skull goes through several more weeks of processing in a vat to bleach it white. It is a form of skull taxidermy.

When our son told us about this new business opportunity, my reaction was less than enthusiastic. “Ugh! Bugs! Flesh eating bugs! Nothing could be more gross!” I thought.

He was very excited about this “side hustle” as he called it, but there was a catch.

There’s always a catch.

He didn’t have the adequate space at his home to have a specially modified deep freeze for a beetle colony, so he asked if we could have them out in my husband’s shop.

Let me add here that we had just spent money having a pest exterminator in to rid ourselves of a small infestation of silver fish in our house. The irony was not lost on me that as we were killing off bugs in the house now we would be growing a new colony of bugs in the shop.

My husband agreed to his request,…me, very reluctantly,…and I couldn’t help thinking as he started setting up his new business enterprise in our shop that at least it was not a freezer full of snakes!

(Stay tuned for next week‘s Part 3 – The Things I Do For My Kids)