Years ago I read a poem by a young Mom.  (I apologize I don’t remember where or who wrote it but it inspired me to write one that applied to my own children (and me).  As they got older, I kept adding to it…

And You Wonder Why They Tune You Out    by:  Lynn Dove

Do you understand?

What did I just say?

I said, ‘Don’t touch’. Don’t touch!
I’m on the phone.
Don’t interrupt me when I’m on the phone.
What did I just say?
I’m on the phone!
I don’t care who started it.
You’re the oldest, you should know better.
No, you can’t have that for breakfast.
No, it’s too close to suppertime.
That will spoil your appetite.
Eat.
Eat that and you can have dessert.
If you don’t eat that no dessert.
OK…no dessert.
Fine.
That’s it.
You’re done.
I’ve had it.
I mean it!
You’re grounded.
Out of there. I said, ‘Get out of there’.
There is nothing for you in there.
You’re not wearing that.
You’re wearing that? Over my dead body.
How ’bout this? What’s wrong with it?
You’ll catch a cold.
Don’t come crying to me.
I don’t have any sympathy.
I told you so.
I told you to.
What did I say?
Now will you listen to me?
No. I said, ‘No’.
What part of “No” did you not understand?
That’s the fifth time I’ve asked you.
How many times do I have to say it?
Are you in or out?
If you’re in you’re in, if you’re out you’re out.
Which is it?
What happened?
What now?
Let me see.
Go ask your Dad.
What did Dad say?
Well, I say the same thing.
What do you want now? Is it important?
Is it life-threatening?
Can’t it wait?
Can’t you see I’m in the bathroom?
Do you need it right now?
Can’t I even go to the bathroom in peace?
You’re all right.
I’ve seen worse.
Let me kiss it better.
No, not right now. I’m busy.
Later.
In a minute.
When I’m done.
Can’t you wait?
Can’t you see I’m right in the middle of something?
I’m coming.
Say you’re sorry.
Say you’re sorry this time and mean it.
Did you try your hardest?
Is that your best effort?
That’s all I ask.
What are you doing?
Don’t do that.
Pick up your clothes.
When you’re finished wearing it, hang it up.
I don’t care whose it is, pick it up.
How many times do I have to ask you?
Clean your room.
Just do it. Not when you feel like it…NOW!
How many times do I have to ask you?
If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
What’s the magic word?
Come on, we’re going.
We’re going to be late.
It takes you fifteen minutes to get out to the car.
Why does it take you fifteen minutes to get out to the car?
Better get ready now, because it takes fifteen minutes for you to get out to the car.
Slow down, wait for Mom.

(Strive to be a Proverbs 31 Wife and Mom!)