It was a fitting song to start my workout this morning: “Stayin’ Alive” by the Bee Gees. I could picture John Travolta strutting beside me, he with a paint can in his hand, and me with my water bottle.
“Whether you’re a brother or whether you’re a mother
You’re stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive
Feel the city breakin’ and everybody shakin’
And we’re stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive…”
I sang the lyrics in my head, trying to keep pace with the beat, but I knew from my previous day’s exertion that walking any faster would wear me out too quickly. My goal was ten laps or two kilometres around the indoor running track at our community’s recreation centre. The day before I had managed seven laps, and almost passed out. I had started my walk trying to keep up with the rhythm of ” Working for the Weekend” by Loverboy. It was way too fast I discovered. I burned out and felt miserable and defeated. Today, I remembered yesterday’s lesson and kept telling myself that slow and steady was the key.
“Well now, I get low and I get high
And if I can’t get either, I really try
Got the wings of heaven on my shoes
I’m a dancin’ man and I just can’t lose
You know it’s alright, it’s okay
I’ll live to see another day
We can try to understand
The New York Times’ effect on man…”
I raised my hands like ” Rocky” when I finished my eleventh lap, and praised God I had surpassed my goal. I’m sure I felt His hand push me forward, or drag me along, either-or, the last half a lap.
It’s slow and steady, daily progress. I didn’t think it would be this hard on this side of cancer. I had so looked forward to being done treatments, but I have been frustrated and discouraged that I still deal with side effects, and fatigue. I thought I would have bounced back by now, but unfortunately that has not been the case. I was ready to start 2020 with a clean bill of health, and be back to my “old” self. Well, “old” seems an apt description some days. Someone told me it might take a year to fully recover from surgery and treatments. I guess I’m not willing to accept that, or use it as an excuse to hold me back. Still, I’m not Super Woman, and I have to listen when my body says “slow down”!
Today though, I am celebrating small victories. Tomorrow’s goal: twelve laps!