And You Wonder Why They Tune You Out

Years ago I read a poem by a young Mom.  (I apologize I don’t remember where or who wrote it but it inspired me to write one that applied to my own children (and me).  As they got older, I kept adding to it…

 

 

 

 

And You Wonder Why They Tune You Out    by:  Lynn Dove

Do you understand?

What did I just say?

I said, ‘Don’t touch’. Don’t touch!
I’m on the phone.
Don’t interrupt me when I’m on the phone.
What did I just say?
I’m on the phone!
I don’t care who started it.
You’re the oldest, you should know better.
No, you can’t have that for breakfast.
No, it’s too close to suppertime.
That will spoil your appetite.
Eat.
Eat that and you can have dessert.
If you don’t eat that no dessert.
OK…no dessert.
Fine.
That’s it.
You’re done.
I’ve had it.
I mean it!
You’re grounded.
Out of there. I said, ‘Get out of there’.
There is nothing for you in there.
You’re not wearing that.
You’re wearing that? Over my dead body.
How ’bout this? What’s wrong with it?
You’ll catch a cold.
Don’t come crying to me.
I don’t have any sympathy.
I told you so.
I told you to.
What did I say?
Now will you listen to me?
No. I said, ‘No’.
What part of “No” did you not understand?
That’s the fifth time I’ve asked you.
How many times do I have to say it?
Are you in or out?
If you’re in you’re in, if you’re out you’re out.
Which is it?
What happened?
What now?
Let me see.
Go ask your Dad.
What did Dad say?
Well, I say the same thing.
What do you want now? Is it important?
Is it life-threatening?
Can’t it wait?
Can’t you see I’m in the bathroom?
Do you need it right now?
Can’t I even go to the bathroom in peace?
You’re all right.
I’ve seen worse.
Let me kiss it better.
No, not right now. I’m busy.
Later.
In a minute.
When I’m done.
Can’t you wait?
Can’t you see I’m right in the middle of something?
I’m coming.
Say you’re sorry.
Say you’re sorry this time and mean it.
Did you try your hardest?
Is that your best effort?
That’s all I ask.
What are you doing?
Don’t do that.
Pick up your clothes.
When you’re finished wearing it, hang it up.
I don’t care whose it is, pick it up.
How many times do I have to ask you?
Clean your room.
Just do it. Not when you feel like it…NOW!
How many times do I have to ask you?
If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
What’s the magic word?
Come on, we’re going.
We’re going to be late.
It takes you fifteen minutes to get out to the car.
Why does it take you fifteen minutes to get out to the car?
Better get ready now, because it takes fifteen minutes for you to get out to the car.
Slow down, wait for Mom.

(Strive to be a Proverbs 31 Wife and Mom!)

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It’s a Canadien Game – Part 2

In 1967 the Toronto Maples Leafs were mostly a veteran hockey team with players like Johnny Bower (age 42), Red Kelly (age 39), Terry Sawchuk (age 37) and Tim Horton (age 37).  Younger players included Eddie Shack (age 30), Frank Mahovlich (age 29), Dave Keon (age 27) and Ron Ellis (age 22).  Frank “King” Clancy was behind the bench as coach after “Punch” Imlach was admitted to hospital following a season that was marked by the longest winless streak of eleven games and the longest losing streak of ten games.  To say that they were the underdogs going into the playoffs would have been a drastic understatement, but they managed to beat the Chicago Black Hawks in the semi-finals in six games thanks in part to solid goaltending on the Leaf team and the untimely injuries to the Chicago goalie, Glen Hall, and sharp-shooter, Bobby Hull.  Few people expected much more from the Leafs especially when the team they would play in the finals, the powerful Montreal Canadiens were going into the finals on a fifteen game undefeated streak, led by rookie goaltender, Rogie Vachon.

“Terry Sawchuk started the first game of the finals but lost 6-2 to Montreal. Johnny Bower took over the net-minding in the second game and shutout Montreal right in the Forum. The Leafs took a one game lead in the finals with an overtime win on a goal by Bob Pulford in the second overtime, but Toronto lost some momentum going into game four when Johnny Bower was injured during the pre-game warm up. Sawchuk replaced Bower and was soundly beaten 6-2 which tied the series at two games apiece going back to Montreal. Terry Sawchuk made up for that game, backing his teammates to a  4-1 win and they headed back to Toronto for game six. Montreal replaced Vachon with Gump Worsley, but the Canadiens could only beat Terry Sawchuk once. The Leafs went on to win that final game 3 – 1 with Jim Pappin scoring what turned out to be the winning goal at 19:24 of the second period. Leaf Captain, George Armstrong iced the game with 47 seconds remaining in the game scoring into the empty net, giving the Toronto Maple Leafs their last Stanley Cup up until this date.”  (Play by play highlights thanks to: http://www.execulink.com/~c67leafs/ )

You’re probably wondering why I took so much time and effort in documenting this important game in 1967…read the last line…it marked the last time the Leafs would hoist the Cup to date!  (Sorry, Dad 🙂 )

From 1968 – 1979, the Montreal Canadiens built an incredible record of winning Lord Stanley’s cup 8 times!  After a particularly exhuberant winning streak of four Cup victories from 1976 – 1979, each time marked by a wild outburst of joyous celebration on my part, and a considerable amount of “smack-talking” about the brilliance of MY team as compared to the dismal showing of his team…my Dad refused to watch hockey with me anymore.   “C’est la vie!”  I said and mocked him even more by attempting to speak french at every opportunity.

A Montreal Canadien dynasty was born during those years and, at least in my mind, has never since been equalled by any other hockey team…except maybe our Canadian women’s Olympic Hockey team.  Yeah, you go girls!!

In the 1975-1976 season, goaltender and Vezina Trophy winner, Ken Dryden aided by stellar defensemen, Serge Savard, Guy Lapointe and Larry Robinson had the best goals against average and led in shutouts.  Great skaters like Yvan Cournoyer, Steve Shutt, Peter Mahovlich, Doug Risebrough, Bob Gainey, Doug Jarvis, and Jacques Lemaire dominated the ice.  But it was MY hockey hero, Guy Lafleur who scored 56 times in that season and with the additional 69 assists he generated earned him the scoring title and the Art Ross Trophy.

While other teenaged girls had Donnie Osmond and Michael Jackson posters tacked up in their bedrooms, I had Montreal Canadian posters and pictures of Guy Lafleur!  I wore my #10 Montreal Canadien jersey everywhere!  My teachers even called me “Guy” in class whenever they noticed that far away day-dreamy look come over me…especially during math class.

When I got married in 1979 and we moved to Alberta…pre Flames era, I still cheered on the Canadiens although my husband, to be contrary, would cheer for any other team that played against Montreal.  He has an “ABC attitude” towards hockey…”Anything But Canadiens”.  I still love him.   

In 1985 Guy Lafleur retired after playing for the Canadiens for fourteen seasons.  I think I actually cried a little bit.

Eleven years later at an “Oldtimer’s Hockey Challenge” event at the Saddledome in Calgary, a hockey dream came true for me…I met Guy Lafleur in person!  I think I actually cried a little bit then too!

As I reflect back over these many years, certainly the game of hockey has changed and I’m not sure for the better.  I will admit that once the NHL continued adding more and more Canadian and American “expansion” teams, and it became more of a business than just playing the game for the game itself, I lost a lot of interest in it.  Still, without fail, once the playoffs start I’m just as caught up in the excitement of the game as I ever was.  I don’t pay much attention anymore who might be playing for which team because the way the business is now, players get traded to other teams so often that even the trading card franchise can’t keep up with them.  I suppose it all sort of started to crumble once Gretsky jumped ship in Edmonton in 1988.  There’s just no team loyalty anymore.  Sad, but true.

My kids are staunch Edmonton Oiler fans…(gasp!)…so I rarely watch hockey games with my own children.  They seem to yell louder and smack talk better  if their team should miraculously beat mine…hahaha…gotcha back, kids!   My son has come around over the years, thanks to his Canadien fan room mates.  I think he has figured, “If you can’t beat ’em, better join ’em!”

During playoffs however, it’s become a tradition in our household each year to cheer on the Canadian teams first and if our Canadian teams are eliminated before the finals, we’ll go for the “underdog” American team.  With both Edmonton and Calgary heading to the golf links early (ie: they failed to make the playoffs), our family sided with the next best team.  Again there’s a certain pecking order (or should I say “picking ” order) for who we cheer for.  The unwritten rule is that we cheer for the Western Canada teams first and then the Eastern teams last.  I’m sure if we lived in the east it would be vice versa.  My family, and I’m sure I speak for all Canadians, are loyal to the geographic makeup of our land.  Weird but true.

After our Western team, the Vancouver Canucks also failed to make the playoffs, we (meaning all self-respecting, loyal Canadians…yet another can of worms opened :)) are all cheering for the Montreal Canadiens.  The first round for the Canadiens seemed relatively easy sweeping their series with Tampa Bay; they are now playing Boston this week.  Based on the games I’ve seen so far, I’m hoping the Canadiens will persevere through what will likely be a hard-fought round with the Bruins, and advance to the next round of this year’s Stanley Cup finals.  I’ll be cheering “Go Habs Go!”  (Habs being the abbreviation of “les habitants,” the informal name given to the original settlers of New France, dating back to the 17th Century.)

This year the Canadiens might be considered a “Cinderella” team.  Even with 24 Stanley Cups, (including their first in 1916, before the NHL existed) behind them, that’s all history.  Their last Cup was hoisted in 1993.  Could this be the year for Montreal to win its 25th Stanley Cup?  All Canadians will and should be cheering them on, after all,… it’s a Canadien Game!

More stats and hockey history can be found: http://proicehockey.about.com/od/history/a/history_timelin.htm ; http://ourhistory.canadiens.com/home ; http://www.hockeydb.com/ ; http://proicehockey.about.com/od/history/f/canadiens_habs.htm

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It’s a Canadien Game – Part 1

I’m a Montreal Canadien’s fan from waaaaay back!  There I’ve said it!  I’ve had to keep it hidden for over thirty years, seeing as I live in Flames territory…Calgary Flames that is.  I mean I love the Flames but mostly it’s because there is a healthy rivalry between the two cities of Edmonton and Calgary and I enjoy talking smack with my neighbours to the north everytime the Flames beat the Oilers.  Don’t worry, they reciprocate every chance they can get too!  That said, my heart has always been with the Montreal Canadiens!

Now for my American friends…I’m talking hockey here.  Not football, and not basketball which I’ve been told you have a certain affinity for.  I never realized how passionately y’all take your football until I tried wearing an Arkansas Razorback T-shirt in Tulsa Oklahoma (Cowboy territory).  My, my!  It’s a mistake you only make once and never ever repeat!  It’s sort of the same premise here in Alberta if someone shows up in an Edmonton Oiler jersey to a Calgary Flames game.  We might boo him as he walks by us or some joker will slosh beer down his neck but that’s about it.  We’re still Canadians after all and basically polite.  Goodness, I have never experienced “shunning” until that Razorback incident there in Tulsa.  I actually feared I might be tarred and feathered!  (Just kidding…sort of.)

Now here in Canada, our passion is hockey.  In the mid 1800’s ice hockey was first played in either Windsor, Nova Scotia; Kingston, Ontario or Montreal, Quebec depending on who you believe and how you read the evidence.  What is not disputed is that the first known rules for hockey were published in the Montreal Gazette in 1877 and in 1888 the Amateur Hockey Association of Canada was formed, with four teams in Montreal, one in Ottawa and one in Quebec City.  Now when I look at those stats as a polite Canadian, I’d just let the city of Windsor take the title of the “Birthplace of Hockey” and let it go because let’s face it, the other cities sort of muscled Windsor out of the hockey spotlight after that.

In 1889 or 1892 the first women’s hockey game was played in Ontario.  I can’t understand why statisticians don’t know the exact year…maybe it was because men historians were reluctant to report on women’s hockey then and give any  credence to the fact that women may have had a decisive and worthy contribution to Canada’s national game.  (Have I opened a can of worms here or what?)  You go girls!!

In 1893, a gentleman by the name of Frederick Arthur, Lord Stanley of Preston and Governor General of Canada, donated a trophy to be called the Dominion Hockey Challenge Cup.  It has since more commonly been referred to as the Stanley Cup and the first winning team was from Montreal.

In 1900 a goal net was first introduced to the game.  I have absolutely no idea what they used before goal nets, I’m assuming they put two tin cans or something on the ice to determine a “crease” area, but no doubt there must have been great disputes over what constituted a valid goal being scored before goal nets.  Probably the first goal scoring dispute led to the first “dropping of gloves” and bench clearing brawl.  Okay, I’m speculating here…but I’m probably right.

In 1910 the Montreal Canadiens played their first game after joining a new league called the National Hockey Association.  Teams in Western Canada formed the Pacific Coast Hockey Association in 1911 and the league introduced blue lines to divide the ice into three zones.  Goaltenders were permitted to fall to the ice to make saves and forward passing was now allowed in the neutral zone.  Again, it’s hard for me to fathom how they played the game without goalies being allowed to drop to the ice to make saves or players making forward passes.  Again I can only speculate that if the lack of goal nets didn’t start the first fight, then I’m pretty sure this must have!

In 1917 the Seattle Metropolitans became the first American-based team to win the Stanley Cup, after the Cup’s trustees ruled that teams outside Canada could compete for the trophy.  Four NHA teams reorganized to form the National Hockey League and a new team, the Toronto Arenas, won the first NHL championship, going on to defeat Vancouver of the Pacific Coast Hockey Association (PCHA) for the 1918 Stanley Cup.  The Arenas would change their name to the Maple Leafs in 1927.

In 1920 an ice hockey tournament was played for the first time at the VII Summer Olympics at the ice palace of Antwerp, Belgium.  All games were played with seven players on each side, with the rover position being used.  The gold medalists were the Winnipeg Falcons, representing Canada and the silver went to the United States and Czechoslovakia took the bronze.  Note: (The rover position was abandoned in Canada in 1912 so the number of players on the ice was reduced from seven to six per team).  In 1924, ice hockey debuted at the Winter Olympics in Chamonix, France and Canada won the gold medal.

In 1929 the first offside rule was introduced.  (See my previous comments about fighting).

In 1937, the first rule to deal with icing was introduced.  (See above).

Beginning in 1942 and for the next 25 years the NHL was comprised of the Montreal Canadiens, Toronto Maple Leafs, Detroit Red Wings, Boston Bruins, New York Rangers and Chicago Black Hawks,  or as we like to refer to them: “the Original Six”.

In 1946 referees began using hand signals to indicate penalties and other rulings.  (I’m just going to let that go.)

Hockey Night in Canada made its first television debut in 1952 and in 1955 Maurice “Rocket” Richard was suspended for the remainder of the season and the playoffs after punching a linesman during a fight.  (see above).  The suspension sparked the “Richard Riot” in Montreal and from then on NHL officials were required to wear striped sweaters for the first time.  (Similar to marking them with a bullseye target I suspect….oh, I’ve opened another can of worms!)

In 1955 my parents immigrated to Canada from Denmark and my father immediately became hooked on watching Hockey Night in Canada with the great Foster Hewitt giving play-by-play commentary.  Having only six teams to choose from and being a new citizen of Canada, my father pledged his hockey allegiance to the Maple Leafs.  In 1967 Canada marked its 100th anniversary of Confederation, Montreal hosted Expo’67 World’s Fair and the National Hockey League doubled in size adding franchises in Pittsburgh, Los Angeles, Minnesota, Oakland, St. Louis and Philadelphia.  This is also the year that I started to show some interest in hockey but I decided to be contrary, so I started to cheer for the Leaf’s closest rivals then: the Montreal Canadiens.  (My father never forgives me!)

Tomorrow, I will continue this little hockey commentary – It’s a Canadien Game – Part 2.

 

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