Believed Through Prayer

Posted on September 3, 2019 by Lynn

I scarce know how to take it in. I’m still not sure if I should be expecting a setback, or a delayed response in the days to come. Oh, me of little faith! It was almost too easy! Yet, here I am now in recovery mode after last week’s fourth round of chemo and this past weekend of “chemo thunder” was little more than a brief inconvenience with minimal discomfort!

Why am I surprised?

And yet I am!

I suppose when I expected the same nasty side effects as the first three rounds, I was somewhat unprepared that this round would be…well…easy compared to the other rounds!

Why is that?

Why am I surprised when prayers are answered? Why do I expect the worst, and then question when the best happens instead?

God is teaching me soooooo many lessons during this “detour”, as my Pastor calls unexpected challenges in life, it will take me a very long time to process all the life lessons I’ve learned over these many months. A friend posted on Facebook a “sermon note” from a message given by her husband at their church on Sunday and I thought this sums up one valuable lesson I’ve learned from this last go-round and one I’ve experienced profoundly throughout this entire journey with cancer: “What’s impossible by might is possible by faith when believed through prayer.” (Thanks Kim and Quentin ❤️)

People have asked me repeatedly how they can “help” me while I do battle with cancer. I am so blessed by acts of service and kindness, from cleaning my house (thanks Carmelle❤️), to making meals for us (the list is too long to share all their names here, but know that we appreciate all of you who have cooked, baked or dropped off groceries for us). My house is filled with fragrant bouquets of flowers from family and friends; I’ve received cards and gift cards, as well as daily texts from family and friends just “checking up” on me. So many people daily leave either a comment or share scripture, or leave words of affirmation on social media to uplift my spirit. Truly I am blessed by all the acts of kindness, but the most important, the most impactful upon my life, have been the countless prayers lifted up to The Father on my behalf.

When people ask what they can do to support me, I immediately say, “Please pray for me,” and they have! Prayer Warriors have awakened in the middle of the night, prompted by the Holy Spirit, to pray. Some have texted me to say that God has laid me on their hearts to pray and many have phoned or dropped in on me in person to pray one-on-one with me. Many others, who don’t understand the concept of prayer yet, say they are sending me “good vibes” or “happy thoughts” my way. I will take them too, but I always direct them to pray because I believe in the power of prayer!

I am praising God for hearing all our prayers and allowing me to get through this last chemo cycle with relative ease. In fact, regardless of what happens over the next two rounds, this fourth round respite has energized me, and given me a renewed resolve to sprint forward. The finish line is around the corner!

Keep praying, dear ones!

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Wait In Peace

Posted on August 27, 2019 by Lynn

It is no coincidence that I just happen to be immersed in the book of Job at this time.  I am following a reading plan in a Bible I gave to my father years ago and when he passed, I inherited it.  Each day of the year is marked out with a reading from the Old Testament, the New Testament, and then a Psalm reading and a verse from Proverbs.  I have read through the Bible several times following this pattern.  I also have a devotional I follow with daily words of encouragement, last year it was Oswald Chambers, “My Utmost for His Highest” and this year, “Discovering God’s Daily Agenda” written by Henry and Richard Blackaby.  I am blessed to call Richard and Henry friends and they have been faithfully praying for me through this health challenge.  Today, my daughter also shared with me a wonderful song from Mercy Me entitled “Even If”.  I will include the video at the end of this post.

My Pastor, in one of his recent sermons that I have been listening to online, says that as Christians we should not have in our vocabulary these words: fate, luck, or coincidence because our lives are not directed by fate, luck or coincidence, our lives are directed by God and nothing is left to chance with Him.  It was not a coincidence that all my readings today were centred around the one theme of faithfully waiting on God, and trusting Him even if I don’t understand why I am going down a hard road at this time.  I know He could heal me instantly if He wanted to.  He is a God of miracles after all, but I must trust Him even if He chooses not to.  God is teaching me to wait in peace.  He is in control.

Last week, at my last doctor’s appointment, I faced temptation.  After hearing about all the challenges I had gone through with the first three rounds of chemotherapy, the doctor shook her head and said, “We have three choices.  Stop your treatments…”  I hardly heard the next two options, because the idea of stopping the chemo nearly overwhelmed me.  To be done, to not have to endure three more rounds, to start to recover, no more side effects, no more weekends of “chemo thunder” as I’ve come to describe the days of battling nausea, pain, and fatigue.  I nearly jumped up and said, “Yay!  I’ll take it!”  Then, that inner voice buzzed in my head, “Wait.  Listen.”

“The other choice is to decrease the dosage of the Paclitaxel, the chemo drug that you seem to be having the most difficult side effects with or lastly, stay the course and I’ll prescribe a new pain pill and see how you do this next round.”

I was still in the throes of embracing temptation with stopping the treatments entirely, when my husband looked at me and shook his head.  He knew my thoughts.  Over the last few months I have put these drugs purposefully into my body to combat the cancer and to combat the side effects caused by those drugs, and each pill comes with its own side effects: Carboplatin, Paclitaxel, Dexamethasone, Metoclopramide, Tramadol-Acetaminophen, Codeine Phosphate, Rantidine, Diphenhydramine, Netupitant/Palonosetron Hydrochloride, and Tinzaparin (blood thinner for my DVT after round 2).  Don’t click on the links if you are prone to squeamishness.  All I know is that mosquitoes refuse to bite me now.  My blood is toxic to the little blood-suckers.  Haha!

The temptation to quit chemo AND stop taking all those drugs was almost overwhelming, but I knew it wasn’t the right choice to make.  As much as I was sorely tempted, I knew I had to stay the course.  I am doing everything humanly possible to combat endometrial cancer, the rest is up to the Great Physician.  I pray for complete healing and to quit treatments now wouldn’t be a prudent move.  Also to decrease a chemo drug lessens its overall effectiveness, so I couldn’t choose that option either.  It wasn’t an easy decision, especially when it took three nurses and five attempts to get an IV into my uncooperative veins yesterday for my fourth round of chemotherapy.  I wondered if I had made the right choice to stay the course.  My poor bruised arm!

This morning, I spent a concerted amount of time with the Lord, crying on His Shoulder, reading His Word, taking comfort in His Presence, and abiding in His Love.  I’ll be okay.  Fractions are my friend!  I’m 2/3 rds the way through treatments!  Can I get a Hallelujah?!

Keep praying for me, dear readers.  Know that I pray for you too, thankful for your encouragement and comments.

 

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Days of Grace

Posted on August 20, 2019 by Lynn

I celebrated my birthday over the weekend. It was a quiet event for the most part. A couple of friends surprised me with visits, and my youngest daughter and her fiancé brought pizzas for an impromptu pizza party in the evening. She celebrates her birthday a week after mine so her siblings are planning a combined family gathering on Sunday. It will hopefully distract me from my fourth chemo treatment on the Monday.

I am thankful I have these “days of grace”, as I call the ten to twelve days leading up to the next treatment. My treatment day and the nine to ten days following it are my most challenging. Chemo side effects level me on the frontline of the battle. Then it is like a fog lifts slowly from the battleground and my body goes into recovery mode. I catch my breath and feel almost normal. I relish these days of grace before I march onto the field of battle again.

During these calm, almost tranquil times, I seek solace and peace from the Lord. He renews my strength and prepares me for the challenging days ahead. I experience first hand what it means to be led beside quiet waters, to be refreshed, and to be comforted as the Psalmist writes in Psalm 23. There is a dark valley to be traversed through ahead of me, but God tells me not to fear because He is with me!

I will admit when I am experiencing the full effects of chemotherapy assaulting my body, I forget God is still with me. I feel alone in the valley, with the enemy screaming in my ear, “You are weak! You are insignificant! I will defeat you this time!” I listen to the lies and feel overwhelmed by the onslaught, but then the Lord’s still, small voice whispers almost imperceptibly into my ear, “You are mine!”

On my own strength, it’s hard to block out the barrage of verbal gunfire the enemy aims at me during those days of chemo thunder. So it is in the midst of battle I cling to Scripture that I have hidden away in my heart to remind me of God’s mercy. God’s Word encourages me to see past my circumstances and to look ahead to the days of grace that follow.

2 Corinthians 4:16-19. “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

Isaiah 40:31. “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Deuteronomy 31:6. “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Matthew 11:28:29 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

John 14:1-4 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you?  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.”

Psalm 23 “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.”

I covet your prayers on Monday and through the next round, dear readers!

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